Don't Suffer In Silence Mom!

Written by Abbie Roberts I just cuddled my preschooler to sleep. I couldn't stop the tears as I thought back to her first year of life when I struggled through post-partum depression. 🌸
The heart breaking truth is most often my feelings and attitudes toward her were ugly. You can imagine, as a mother feeling these ugly things about her own child, the guilt and shame were endless making things that much worse. 🌸
It wasn't until one night talking to my husband about my feelings and actually saying the words out loud, giving this shadowy presence a name, that I was able to see it in the light for what it actually was. He was able to help me see and speak truth into the lies that I had believed about myself. In exposing the truth of the circumstances both shame and guilt began losing their hold on me and I began to experience a growing joy again. Slowly, but faithfully.🌸
Why do I share this? Because in those days I held on to my suspicions of PPD quietly, feeling like I was the only one who thought these thoughts or felt these feelings and it ate at me every day. Since then I've realized how many have walked this path before me, with me and walk it now after me. I know that battling shame is a continual process of bringing into the Light and I pray that by sharing I can give others the hope they need to break free from the shame they might have in their own life. 🌸
If you suspect the possibility of PPD/PPA in yourself, or even battle your own version of shame, don't believe the lie that you can keep it bottled inside until it dissipates. Shame says that you are unlovable , that if only people knew the truth about your thoughts they would be horrified. Its very nature and survival instinct is to remain in the dark and often succeeds. I promise you though, as long as its left in the dark it will fester and grow and tear you down from the inside. Please don't believe its lie. Consider sharing your darkness with someone you trust or with a professional and remember that you are loved AS YOU ARE. In your darkness, in your pain, in your grief, in your shadows, in your ugliness-You are loved. 💜
#postpartumdepression #shame #guilt #honestmomconfessions #youareloved #hope